Xena: Warrior Princess

Release Date: October 5, 1999

"Mostly it’s a case of stumbling along, waiting for the next soldier"

Bit late really, isn’t it? Nice potential (clanging swordplay, magic, monster pick-’n’-mix and bottomless cleavage), shame about the timing and execution. Comparisons with a certain other spunky lady may be inevitable, but the hope of Xena as Lara-come-lately is sadly scuppered by a clunky control system and painfully linear gameplay.

For the record, the evil Kalabrax, imprisoned by the Gods, has escaped. Sniffing around for a human sacrifice, Ms Kalabrax picks on Xena’s sidekick Gabrielle. Xena not happy. Xena fights her way through 21 levels of third-person combat peppered with occasional puzzles en route to a final confrontation.

She kicks, she rolls, she leaps, she decapitates an endless succession of Kalabrax broadsword-flailing bozos. All aided by the standard health potion and weapon/armour-upgrade pick-ups and a few rugged chaps booming out the odd bit of Zen guidance (“If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?”) The puzzle bits are passable, but they’re spoiled by the old problem of it being too easy to tell the murky decorative backgrounds from the brightly coloured Things To Interact With.

Mostly, it’s a case of stumbling along, waiting for the next soldier to attack, and while there’s been a reasonable effort to vary Xena’s fighting moves, you'll find yourself repeatedly hammering the sword button rather than waste time and energy messing about with complex kick/sword/roll combo antics. The platform elements are also pretty shaky. Positioning Xena to face in the right direction is tiresome enough, but dare to misjudge the jump for that next crate and there’s no Tomb Raider-style cling-to-the edge correction. It’s back to the beginning for another flash of deja vu.

Successes? Well, efforts have been made to keep the game flowing seamlessly from area to area with only a quick tea-slurp’s worth of loading time, and although the fights tend to be awkward, multi-directional affairs, they kick off with some highly amusing battle cries (“Die, witch!”) There’s also a great bit with a grotesque, boulder-hurling Cyclops which works as a satisfying mix of all-out combat and lateral thinking.

If you’re currently updating your ‘Xena’s Kick-Ass Web-Shrine,’ you’ll swoon over the fairly accurate show-to-game content and mood. More discerning gamers should rent it or leave it.